A Student Affairs professional's response to “How many people does it take to change a light bulb?"

VP’s Office- What are the learning outcomes associated with changing that bulb?

Assoc. VP – does this action align with our strategic plan?

Asst. VP- and who do you think is going to pay for all these bulbs?

Financial Aid- File your FAFSA, then worry about it.

Residence Life- You need to bring your own light bulbs, read your contract.

Student Activities- We reserved ALL the light bulbs a long time ago…and have a signed contract!

Student Union- We’ll have to charge you extra to change the bulb.

Student Government- We’ll pass a resolution recognizing the bulb is out, then it shall be out.

Judicial Affairs- If you read the code we have 5 days to decide then 3 days to respond then 5 days to act.

Student Support Service- Some first generation students haven’t even seen a light bulb.

Admissions and Records- FERPA doesn’t allow us to tell you that information.

Prospective Student- Our light bulbs never burn out, it’s perfect here, read the script.

Legal Counsel- Well who bought those bulbs in the first place?

First Year Experience- At least two, and they need to feel like they matter.

Disability Resource Center- According to the ADA that ceiling will have to be lowered.

Greek Life-We don’t change anything, it is always out…it’s tradition! Can we still have our party?

Career Development- One each from the MBTI personality types should work. Let’s create an internship for it!

Service Learning- Let’s see who wants to volunteer for that job.

Transition Programs- No, really it’s not too late, you can still change it.

Counseling Center- We would like to tell you but that’s confidential.

Tutoring Program- We can teach anyone how to change it.

Bookstore- We have bulbs with the logo on sale this week at 20% off.

Graduate Students- Oh sure you ask us to change light bulbs but forget us every other time.

Strategic Planning- Within five years we won’t even need light bulbs.

Ombudsperson/Mediation- Everyone will have to agree with the changing process.

Information Technology - If you had backed up your files, these wouldn’t be a problem.

Testing Center- A high analytical score will determine the changer.

Building & Grounds- We need a work order and account number, and will put in our queue.

The Student- It is just a light bulb, take it easy!!!!